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31. Do You Have To Be An Asshole To Be Successful?

Updated: Oct 2, 2020

How does it happen that a lot of people in power appear to be actual DICKS? Or at least what they present themselves to be is nothing less than a proper asshole. Of course one's asshole level is relative to each individual, but I am sure that there is a subconscious universal continuum where most people can place Donald Trump far away from Mother Teresa or Gandhi. But there is this corresponding face of success that co-aligns with being a dickhead. Why? Let's explore this and see if being a dick actually predisposes you to success.

What we can do is look at the definition of 'success', what makes someone a successful individual? My mates over at the OED (Oxford English Dictionary) define success as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. By that definition, success is the end of whatever means you are trying to achieve. This, therefore makes success relative to each individual dependent on whatever means one is trying to accomplish. However, Western culture has seemed to harvest an image of success based purely on materialistic possessions. Money, power, assets and the holidays that you have blasted over Instagram to ensure that we all know how good your life is while making other souls slowly wane are some of the multitude of things that we deem as signs of success.

I could easily get very political here and say that capitalism ultimately cultivates our greed and need for materialistic goods but... politics genuinely fry the flip out of my brain. Especially in times like these, I like to abstain myself from involuntary politics because they do seem to be in every freaking place you look. So rather than exploring the centrality of that political influence - which is unfortunately difficult to refrain from - let's look at the psychological impact of living in a capitalist society and what it does to deceive our perspective of success.

Psychopaths - someone with antisocial tendencies that manifest egocentricity, lack of ability to be empathetic and love others and are manipulative beings - in capitalist societies would most likely be at the 'top of the chain'. Minimal emotional awareness allows psychopaths to not take into account others, which in terms of living in a capitalist society facilitates one to climb that rat race ladder. Honestly, you could have all the materialistic wealth in the world as a result of being ruthless - is that true success?

Why we correlate success with being an asshole comes down to us instinctively mixing up being successful and being powerful. If you desire to be powerful and face thousands of individuals with authority, being an asshole may just be an obligation for you. Imagine how laborious it would be having to take into account the feelings of everyone that your decision affected, no wonder Donald Trump is in power because it does not look like he considers anything emotionally - ever! When it comes to success it is actually an entirely different narrative.

So, do you have to be an asshole to be successful? Short answer: no. To be successful, one does not have to be an asshole. You do not have to tear down others to get on top and be successful. If your relative success does in fact include being a dick, first of all F**K YOU but second of all I guess that's fine if that is what will make you succeed (relative to you and your goals) then so be it. But you can just as easily be as nice as Nelson Mandela and actually succeed. You define your own success, try to not be an asshole and maybe you will be successful and simultaneously liked. Wow! Who would have thought?

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This blog will encompass the life of a 19-year-old kiwi chica. Composed of stories, advice, life lessons, worldly observations, videos and whatever else Ella's life brings to surface.For all of this and more, read my new found blog 'Born In 2000': established on the 28th of October, 2019. Where Ella Gibson explores her life that exceeds all limitations. Publications should be expected twice a week. Take this present moment now and rock it!

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